Monday, February 11, 2013

The Beacon & Eggs Super-sized Challenge

Beacon and Eggs
Suite 3-2305 Beacon Avenue 
Sidney, B.C.
(778) 426-0549 

E: Only James could get lost in the small downtown of Sidney, B.C. We were off to Beacon and Eggs since the Breakfest Club needed to be challenged, y'know?

I mean, this man can eat his weight in gold! He lives in the 80's and still loves the Japanese anime from that era. Just look at him, and he'll tell you his many fond memories of growing up at places he's not seen for close to two decades.

J: It's all true and do I regret any of it? Hardly. I am who I am and I'm a man who can put away 6 eggs benedict and still retain my hunger (I've never attempted 7 because I don't wish to appear as the little piggy).

I got lost in Sidney because I confused Pier One Restaurant with Beacon and Eggs. It's a simple mistake. Ed didn't think so but I managed to drown out his voice and enjoy one of the little communities I so love.

E: Well, I had a feeling the diner was closer to the highway than towards the water. But I guess James' sinking feeling was going to get him knee deep into only snickers by me. Mind you, after seeing that gut killer of a manwich, I could only be too kind but to offer to help pay for that $17.95 meal.

J: I had no intention of taking on Beacon's challenge but little did I know that Ed had planned this from the beginning. He had faith I would at least put a dent in the monstrosity but one look at what was laid before me and I knew it would be difficult. This meal had to be consumed in under 20 minutes but after viewing it I was able to deduce that 30 minutes and no less was needed to slay the creature.

There's a reason only 7 people were successful and with the exception of one, they were all of my build. To quote to Ed the philosopher Hardy "That's another fine mess you've gotten me into."

E: It's hard to tell, given our builds, in figuring out who is the Stan Laurel or Oliver Hardy this duo. James has the ivy cap style hat, and I have the ears of a cat. That is, a curiousity to see if this meal could be tackled.

I saw the pictures of this challenge meal, and I really did have to question if the mega-platter was delicious or not. After James admitted defeat, I started pecking at this behemoth to see what was cooked right. I suspect the cooks never planned on providing an appetizing meal; everything was whipped up to fatten the goose than to satisfy the gourmet.

J: I had to eat 3 plate sized waffles with scrambled eggs, sausages, bacon and corn hash in-between the layers. The waffles gave me a gagging reflex. They weren't even cooked properly, and as for everything else, it was bland. I'm not giving myself an excuse, I knew at the 5 minute mark I wouldn't be able to finish the meal.

But what I am saying is if they had actually made the dish with better care, I might not have had the reaction I did. The breakfast club is a novelty and nothing more. For $17.95 it's not even worth the amount of food if it makes you want to spit it back out. My advice is to enjoy something else on their menu because there was no enjoyment to be had in my first visit.

E: Even for my green eggs & ham, I found the meal hefty.

Beacon & Eggs must serve lumberjacks. After seeing the portion sizes of what gets consumed here, the calories gained can easily be burned off in the bush.

I had rye bread with my meal, and my eyes bulged out at the size of the four pieces of toast. I'm not a fan of jam (of any flavours) and left the jam pats alone. There was only enough to put on only one slice than the four.

I liked the eggs; they tasted farm fresh, and the spinach was nothing I'd rave about. Now if this meal was anything like a certain salad I had at the Pioneer House at Whippletree Junction, then I'd be singing praises. I'm stuck on heirloom tomatoes and to taste a bit of green tomatoes sweetly fried would've turned the products here from more of a basic bite to gourmet.

J: But even with the basics offered, I'm willing to give Beacon another try. The staff have so much heart that I think everyone who walks through those doors feels this is a place where everybody knows your name. True it's no Cheers but there is a counter with a bar stool that'll have my name on it the next time I'm in town.

3 Blokes out of 5

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